Welcome
this is my new blog. I have written blogs earlier, a long, long, long time ago, in a gala--- … Let’s just say, this time, there’s a purpose for me to write.
Also, to the best of my memory I think this is the first time I decided to write in English.
My story starts from long time ago…if it could start from the beginning, the birth of me. but I’m not sure is there any point in that because of… reasons. I can’t remember much and therefore I would have to struggle to keep things order.. I didn’t have a clue that there might be something different with me until I moved away from home… but now, that I look back. the signs were always there. But, because I lived in the countryside in a family that was quite openminded, well, I get through early life nicely. I had some difficulties in school, mostly because of adhd… hard to stay still, concentrate all the usual issues, but because I wasn’t complete idiot, I survived, and learned enough to study on my own.
I will talk more about who I am, my diagnoses and explain what causes what, in later posts. This… this will be a short intro to what is the meaning of this blog which currently doesn’t have name at all, but maybe I make one up before I publish this.
So back to my short story. I moved to study in city, not so far from home, but far enough that I didn’t live in home anymore. Met a amazing woman, had a child together, almost ruined it all many times. Forced the family to move again and again, because I got bored (I can’t think of any other reason). Got drunk more and more often, seeing nothing wrong in it. Almost ruined the family again and again.
Wife kept telling me that all was not right, but I didn’t believe her because how could anything be wrong with me? I was perfect. I kept doing stupid things, kept thinking I was the Gift for Humankind. Until, that is, she told me, if things don’t change she would take our child and move to another city. Slowly I started to look at myself. And after year or two, when I was (once again in another city) in the Public Employment and Business Services office, when I spoke with a vocational selection Psychologist, he had the task of helping me, find a job or school. Instead he looked at me and said, “You are not fine… I will send you first to a doctor, let’s see what they say. After that we might find where you go next!” Now, if my wife didn’t earlier tell me that I’m not fine, I would have not have listened the man. However, that was the final straw, I was about 26 then… and then the journey to find me started.
The meaning of this blog is to open up the life of human who suffers more than just one hiding chronic illnesses.
I find my strength to keep on working and studying, living the jollygood life, fighting with the bureaucracy... my strength come from my family, my wife and child (who’s not so tiny anymore) and art.
I try to keep my art out of this... but most likely I can’t.
The Faulty Man has: ADHD, Bipolar Disorder, Fibromyalgia and all the little ones that comes with them. You know. dyslexia, mania, tremors, pain, dizziness, unable to concentrate much… and lot’s of broken joint’s and such. … and .. asthma (allergic to synthetic smell thingies), and something in the heart that make’s me faint in high stress or demanding exercise, and migraine, and.. still I got a feeling I’m forgettin something.
But now… now I need to think hard to find a name for my new blog.. decide will there be photos here. will I write with my name or just alias.. so much to think about.
